Picky Eaters
What is a picky eater?
The peak time for picky eating is the toddler or preschool
years. A picky eater:
- may complain or whine about what is served
- refuses certain foods, especially vegetables and meats
- pushes foods around the plate
- hides foods or gives them to a pet under the table
- eats enough total foods and calories per day for normal
growth.
What causes it?
Children of all ages (and adults) commonly have a few food
dislikes. A picky eater is a child with many food
dislikes. At age 2 or 3, up to 20 percent of children are
picky eaters. It is normal for most young children to
dislike foods with a bitter or spicy taste. Sometimes
children dislike foods because of their color, but more
often it's because they are difficult to chew. Children
accept tender meats better than tough ones, and
well-cooked vegetables better than raw. Occasionally a child
who gags on large pieces of all foods has large tonsils
that make it difficult to swallow.
How long does it last?
Most children who are picky eaters will grow out of it.
They start trying new foods during the early school years
because of peer pressure. The voracious appetite during the
teen years also increases the willingness to experiment. If
you try to force your child to eat a food he doesn't like,
he may gag or even vomit. Forced feedings always interfere
with the normal pleasure of eating and eventually decreases
the appetite. Learning to accept new foods should not be
expected before the teenage years.
How can I help my child?
- Try to prepare a main dish that everyone likes. Try to
avoid any unusual main dish that your child strongly
dislikes. Some children don't like foods that are mixed
together, such as casseroles. Try reintroducing such
dishes when your child is older.
- Allow occasional substitutes for the main dish. If your
child refuses to eat the main dish and this is an
unusual request, you may allow a substitute dish.
Acceptable substitutes would be breakfast cereal,
yogurt, or a simple sandwich the child prepares for
himself. If the only meat your child will eat is
chicken, keep a supply in the refrigerator for when
you need a protein source. Never become a short-order
cook and prepare any extra foods for mealtime. The
child should know that you expect him to learn to eat
the main dish that has been prepared for the family.
- Respect any strong food dislikes. If your child has a
few strong food dislikes (especially any food that makes
her gag), do not serve that food to her when it's
prepared as part of the family meal.
- Don't worry about vegetables, just encourage more
fruits. Because vegetables tend to be hard to chew and
some of them are bitter, they are commonly rejected by
children and even by many adults. Keep in mind that
fruits and vegetables are from the same food group.
There are no essential vegetables. Vegetables can be
largely replaced by fruits without any nutritional harm
to your child. This is not a health issue. Don't make
your child feel guilty about avoiding some vegetables.
- Don't allow complaining about food at mealtimes. Have a
rule that it's okay to decline a serving of a particular
food or to push it to the side of the plate. But
complaining or whining about it is unacceptable. For
whining about food, give 1 warning. If it happens
again, send your child away from the eating area for 5
minutes. If he gets disruptive again, send your child
to his room and put his food in the refrigerator. After 1
hour, he can again have his food if he requests it.
- Encourage your child to taste new foods. Many tastes
are acquired. Your child may eventually learn that she
likes a food she initially refuses. Research shows, it
may take seeing other people eat a new food 10 times
before they're even willing to taste it, and another 10
times of tasting it before they develop a liking for it.
Don't try to rush this normal process of adapting to new
foods. Don't talk about bites because trying to force
a child to eat one bite of a food per year of age is
not helpful with most picky eaters. Instead, it's
better to simply serve it repeatedly, ask your child
to taste it, then trust him when he says that he did.
- Avoid pressure or punishment at mealtime. Never
pressure, beg, or bribe your child to eat all foods.
Never punish your child for refusing to take one bite
of a new food. It will only lead to liking that food
less over time, gagging, or even vomiting. If your
child has a stubborn, strong-willed nature, pressure
around eating can progress to a power struggle which
in turn prolongs the picky eating.
- Don't argue about dessert. An unnecessary area of
friction for picky eaters is a rule that if you don't
clean your plate, you can't have any dessert. Since
desserts are not necessarily harmful, a better approach
is to allow your child one small portion of desert no
matter what she eats. However, there are no seconds on
dessert for children who don't eat an adequate amount of
the main course. Desserts don't have to be sweets, they
can be nutritious desserts such as fruit.
- Don't argue about a bedtime snack. If your child
complains about bedtime hunger, avoid a long
discussion. Give him a small, plain snack (such as
cereal) before it is time to brush his teeth.
- Don't extend mealtime. Don't keep your child sitting at
the dinner table after the rest of the family is done.
This will only cause your child to develop unpleasant
associations with mealtime. If he suddenly wants to
eat, give him 5 extra minutes.
- Keep the mealtime atmosphere pleasant. Make it an
important family event. Draw your children into
friendly conversation. Tell them what's happened to you
today and ask about their day. Talk about fun subjects
unrelated to food. Avoid making it a time for criticism
or struggle over control.
- Avoid conversation about eating at any time. Don't
discuss what your child eats in your child's presence.
Trust your child's appetite to look after your child's
caloric needs. Also don't give praise for appropriate
eating. Don't give bribes or rewards for meeting your
eating expectations. Children should eat to satisfy
their appetite, not to please the parent. Occasionally
you might praise your child for trying a new food that
he does not like the taste or texture of.
- Give your child a daily vitamin-mineral supplement.
If your child is not eating at least 1 serving or
meat per day, give a multivitamin with iron to
prevent iron deficiency anemia. Although vitamins are
probably unnecessary for most of us, they are not
harmful in normal amounts and may allow you to be less
concerned about your child's nutrition and health.
When should I call my child's health care provider?
Call during office hours if:
- Your child is losing weight.
- Your child gags on or vomits certain foods.
- Your child has heartburn.
- You have other questions or concerns.
Written by B.D. Schmitt, M.D., author of "Your Child's Health," Bantam Books.
This content is reviewed periodically and is subject to
change as new health information becomes available. The
information is intended to inform and educate and is not a
replacement for medical evaluation, advice, diagnosis or
treatment by a healthcare professional.
Copyright © 2006 McKesson Corporation and/or one of its subsidiaries. All Rights Reserved.